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The sky is everywhere – Jandy Nelson pt.2

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I fell in love with a stranger

He comes to me at night

Fills me with memories of love

I can never see him or touch him

I can only hear his whisper, the sensation of his soul

 

Last night just before the break of another day

He called to me whispering gently

His eyes shining with joy

And his smile holds an eternity of pure affection

 

I look into him, masking my sadness with bliss

How can one feel so loved and abandoned at the same time?

Can love really bring two unknown spirits together

And tear them apart just as they learn to hold on?

 

He holds my hand against his chest

As I cling to the strings of his heart

A tear falls down his face

I love you, we can never be together

 

The biting cold of the words tore me apart

As my soul shivers to the wake of the morning.

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A man of make-believe

He pulls me in to the depths of a trance

Seducing my spirit to the sound of his melody

His voice enveloping me in an embrace

I drown in the love of his serenade.

 

His song sends shivers to my every bone

The warmth of his words holding every piece of my heart

His grasp tightens, protective, caressing

As he sends every part of me unravelling.

 

I could wish for nothing more

Than to swim forever in your veins

Get lost in the darkness of paradise

And dance to the rhythm of your soul.

 

I would have allowed the night to consume me

Hoping the shadows would lead me unto you

But the sun beams bright through the window

Its warm rays never felt so empty

 

The music stops.

I woke up.

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Perfect. I couldn’t believe…

We were walking side by side

Illuminating each other’s way

As we went through our journey

Taking strides beside a parade of lost souls

 

I looked into his eyes and drowned in his gaze

I felt the silence pulling us together

The absence of words could only tell so much

A few seconds of shared eternity

 

I tried to escape falling in to the strange

But he held on to me, opened up

Let me inside his soul

A place untouched, a place of love

 

People go through days of their life

Without completely knowing someone

Then a stranger knocks inside your dream

And gives his entire self away

 

I woke up to a new day.

He was still there.

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He was always there

Inside my dreams, in my fantasies

A world of unreal and of make belief

A place where one day he’s a child, a stranger

An older man and at times a friend

 

How come he is here in my reality?

Or is the boy I see an illusion?

How can I see him more clearly than before

But feel more distant than forever?

 

Maybe he was real, maybe it was wrong

To think I have fallen in love with a stranger

No one can come into our dreams

Without passing by our reality

 

What are dreams anyway

Than a mere distortion of our lives

A different angle of the present

A look into what could have been

 

The thought pierced like a thousand blades

A fragment of what could have been

A chance missed, a love lost

His memory came crashing back like a storm

 

He was my biggest mistake.

He was my biggest heartbreak

He was the one and now gone

Forever.

 

To lose your memory forever…

 

I wished …

 

 

It was only just a dream…

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Happiness is…

7:30 mornings seemingly lost in a trance

Sharing an understanding with you in silence

It’s dozing off, sitting at the back of the room

Watching you listen to class in your costume

 

Happiness is afternoons when feelings are entirely hopeless

So we fill our thoughts with pop, rock and punk voices

It’s when everything gets more weary than before

So we share a hug before the teacher walks through the door

 

Happiness is disrupting the class with random shouting

accompanied by corny jokes that’s still worth our laughing

It’s endless breaks when you’re playing the guitar

About songs of September or cruising afar

 

Happiness is wrongfully credited triumphs won by you

And heart-shattering defeats cried out by two

It’s a circle of people completely trusting

Standing together in failure, shame and cheating

 

Happiness is mindlessly running fingers through your curly hair

Staring at how the rays make your skin sunset fair

It’s crossing the busy street, holding hands

Not minding if other people misunderstands

 

Happiness is 4:30 afternoons eating at the bottom steps

Laughing at things that sees no depths

It’s saying goodbye to the wonderful people you know

It’s writing this, missing them as you watch each go.

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Daughter of the fire

They say that on a quiet summer’s night

When the sky’s cloudy and the moon shines no light

The daughter of the fire walks with her knife

Stabs the blood out of someone’s life

And make them scream and scream some more

Scream to their last breath until there’s no more

 

Her wrath has inspired fear for years of two or three

Only a few months after my greatest tragedy

Whips of fire slashed my husband to death

My daughter lost never hearing her last breath

So when you scream in fear of the daughter of the fire

All I hear is the song of my heart’s sorrowful lyre

 

Alone and grieved, I’m almost empty

Days have gone and the earth’s moved without me

The only spark left keeping my heart beating

Are the endless nights of infinite screaming

And that’s when I felt an invincible hunger

To step into the darkness and come to her

 

In the silence of the night and a wave of bravery

I hear her whispers calling for me

And as I go nearer to the girl of mere shadow

I hear my insides howl and my breath shallow

I sense her cold breathing, the end of her knife

My head starts to ring ‘Run for your life’

 

She runs her scaly fingers down my spine

Dripping cold tears the color of wine

Whispering vague chatter at the back of my neck

She unravels me, my courage in a wreck

Uncontrollable fear became my body’s sire

That’s when I stabbed the daughter of the fire

 

And I did it once, twice or maybe ten times

Every cut for the price of her crimes

When her screams silenced, I froze up like ice

I was looking at my husband’s face and my own eyes

That’s when the tears start to wash over me

I killed my own daughter at the price of misery

 

At the hour of death nothing’s left

but last words spoken, last tears wept

I cried my heart and wondered what for

I came to seek but end up losing more

And in the end I felt nothing but hate

To die by her hands is my own written fate

 

They say that on a quiet summer’s night

When the sky’s cloudy and the moon shines no light

The daughter of the fire walks with her knife

Stabs the blood out of someone’s life

And vengeance shall scream and scream some more

Scream to her last breath until I’m no more